r/BatmanArkham • u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! • Jul 26 '24

You can trust Me :) Humor

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3.5k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

288 comments sorted by

•

u/BatmanArkham-ModTeam Jul 26 '24

NOOOOOO

DONT SWIPEŘÀÆ_ƏÅ!¡

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429

u/Competitive_Aide5646 Jul 27 '24

https://preview.redd.it/8ugmbaqjgyed1.jpeg?width=1101&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=eda3816568e3215a31ef306679ba9c12cb8c81fa

69

u/Mr-_-Midas Sub to my YT and Twitch, I no wanna be Frycook Jul 27 '24

I didn’t wipe. I fell asleep.

12

u/USilver Jul 27 '24

The fact that I’m actually kinda excited for chapter 3 of this shi to come out 😭🙏🏼

4

u/suitcasecat Jul 27 '24

I'm excited to play it tbh, looks really cool. Everyone seems to hate this game because of the incest but if the steam page is anything to go by, the dev knows it's messed up and is using that to craft a story on purpose

113

u/Usual-Tangerine-9362 Man fanatic Jul 27 '24

NOOOO WHY DID I WIPE, AM I STUPID?1

33

u/edukettu Jul 27 '24

I am sorry to inform you that you are no longer stupid. You are in fact smart now. I would recommend telling your close friends and family about your sudden smartness so they can help you navigate the world outside aslume.

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100

u/JD_R_D who the FUCK am i? Jul 27 '24

N..NO…

54

u/Effective_Poem7629 Jul 27 '24

I parry the pills

28

u/lolwhat1117 Bone 🥵🥵🥵 Jul 27 '24

*Rules of Nature starts to play in the background*

20

u/Stormtendo I am vengence, I am the knight, I am BATMAN! Jul 27 '24

https://i.redd.it/021bcrfmdzed1.gif

14

u/xCreeperBombx Jul 27 '24

A pill?

Parry the pill?!

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18

u/Kman3987 Jul 27 '24

Instructions unclear, I wiped my ass

36

u/Audi_R8_Gaming Arkham World / Audi R8 V10 Plus (bone is sexy) Jul 27 '24

https://i.redd.it/jgezzz8tnyed1.gif

17

u/AntonRX178 Jul 27 '24

Wait a minute... Batman?

Wait where am I?

14

u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

YES! Welcome back to sanity my friend. You are in the asylum. The exit is on the right. Good to have you back friend :)

10

u/AntonRX178 Jul 27 '24

https://preview.redd.it/qyadidb0m1fd1.jpeg?width=689&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74657dfa2147938c6b7e851395a7439578817b11

I am armed with an exploding Pro-aslume gas device on my body. It's permanent effect two. CHECKMATE

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63

u/lolwhat1117 Bone 🥵🥵🥵 Jul 27 '24

YOU FOOL!

I CAME PREPARED WITH EXTRA JONKLE PILLS AND EXTRA ASLUME PILLS (and gas)

NOW TAKE THIS!

https://preview.redd.it/pb1w511dazed1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7b30b069e55076eece42d445297f3d39225522a2

30

u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

NOOOOO YOU CANT MAKE ME

23

u/lolwhat1117 Bone 🥵🥵🥵 Jul 27 '24

YES I CAN!

I SUMMON MY STANDO, EXTREMELY HORNY QUEEF

https://preview.redd.it/59rmsj5qbzed1.png?width=2053&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f2027c95964359354bd7b42f592788a205cf57cd

EXTREMELY HORNY QUEEF, COOK THIS NON-BELIEVER!

8

u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

She stands no chance against BATMAN. An actual REAL dc comics character!

25

u/EpicHomie315 I'm proud of you, Dick Jul 27 '24 edited Jul 27 '24

https://preview.redd.it/0bpw4wmma0fd1.png?width=540&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3205730150f2b96e0f55daa143d1e792af30fb3a

i'm will never join u, i only knows man, no batsman. i'm stay stupid and take pro aslume pills

9

u/IamAlphariusCLH Jul 27 '24

I'm proud of you, Dick!

21

u/RequirementFew1374 Alsume Inmate Jul 27 '24

https://i.redd.it/yib7mxe2syed1.gif

13

u/Super3vil most deranged aslume patient Jul 27 '24

Hell yeah.

6

u/mattoviperau yeah...i'm Man Jul 27 '24

No! Fuck you and your entire bloodline for the past 400 years! Batman ain't real and it's just horny man!

6

u/Bruh_Momenter69 Am I stupid? Jul 27 '24

Wait, I’m Free? IM FREE! YES! IM FREE FROM THE ASYLUM! I CAN GO HOME!!!!

https://preview.redd.it/p8bvj9e8d2fd1.png?width=543&format=png&auto=webp&s=aaea471fde02cebf93ca9480627756df0441d194

3

u/TheMagicDrPancakez Jul 27 '24

Come back we miss you!

2

u/Bruh_Momenter69 Am I stupid? Jul 27 '24

NO! IM NOT FALLING FOR YOUR TRICKS AGAIN LIKE LAST TIME!

2

u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

Welcome back to sanity my friend :)

2

u/Bruh_Momenter69 Am I stupid? Jul 27 '24

THANK YOU! WHERE IS THE EXIT

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4

u/ReaperDaemon666 who the FUCK am i? Jul 27 '24

I came, I saw and I swope. And then I was disappointed.

3

u/Sqvuiel Jul 27 '24

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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7

u/aabb22ci Jul 27 '24

Yes! Sane people rise!

https://i.redd.it/deymm2b6bzed1.gif

9

u/Apprehensive_Art5345 big boss Jul 27 '24

How dare you use Dante against insanity you crook. I use FREAKY DANTE ATTACK

https://preview.redd.it/ufshpidauzed1.jpeg?width=1352&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=34c4aea17cc037767f824fa9c289ce652b0e4084

2

u/aabb22ci Jul 27 '24

I'm bi, your idiot. A freaky Dante is exactly what i want

5

u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

Join me brother and we will cleanse this madhouse from all its sins!

2

u/GoatGuy23 Fighting for INsanity! Jul 27 '24

Who is this Batman? why does he have red eyes, is he evil

2

u/Prometheus850 The Jul 27 '24

Is there a lore reason why I swiped? Am I stupid?

2

u/Apprehensive_Art5345 big boss Jul 27 '24

Jokes on you I keep my aslume pills stowed away in my balls

2

u/COOLSKELETON95____ what the fuck is a “bat-man” Jul 27 '24

i-it’s working i-i’m-.. burps

nevermind, i’m fine

2

u/BesaidBlitzBoi Alsume Inmate Jul 27 '24

2

u/JodkaVodka Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

I swiped... I finally know who Batman is again. Who the fuck is Man?

2

u/ItsBlitz21 Jul 27 '24

I’m too far gone the second slide didn’t even faze me. Man forever

2

u/William_The_Fat_Krab Jul 27 '24

Brother, dont worry i am a spy. I am already sane

3

u/TheRealDave_Miller Yah... i'm someone who is proud of themself, Dick. Jul 27 '24

I'm sending this to r/ArkhamRehabilitation as weaponry, thanks :D

3

u/Ill_Afternoon9488 Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

Np fellow rehab member 👍👍👍

2

u/TheRealDave_Miller Yah... i'm someone who is proud of themself, Dick. Jul 28 '24

Ah you're a rehab member. Nice. Sending the weaponry over now, thanks for your contribution :D

1

u/EZL2011 Custom (Nothing Inappropriate)🗣️ Jul 27 '24

IVE BEEN TRICKED

1

u/PlantainSame Jul 27 '24

Man is not real.Batman is not real it is Michael keaton in a rubber suir

1

u/WhiteNibba96 Jul 27 '24

Nah I don't trust soup anymore

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1

u/Higherbites Jul 27 '24

YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!

1

u/Yami_Sean Jul 27 '24

Joke's on you. I am imune to these pills.

1

u/Freeonlinehugs Nah... i'm Woman Jul 27 '24

Me, boutta taking all the candy away from here

1

u/lamilcz Fighting for INsanity! Jul 27 '24

NOOOOOOO! YOU CANT MAKE ME TAKE THEM YOU CANT! I MUST JONKLE!

1

u/Seventh_Deadly_Bless Y fr bro got aslume stuck ? 🤪 Got Jonkler W rizz ? Jul 27 '24

What's swiping ? Is there a lore reason why I forgot ?

1

u/No-Tomorrow-8150 Jonkler's jonking jerking Jadonka Jonkling Jul 27 '24

Don't worry I've been huffing Dr. Man's Super Duper Aslume Gas all week.

1

u/chourael Jul 27 '24

You won't fool me this time soup, i will not swipe

1

u/Sussysusamogussus Jul 27 '24

no thma-

oh, damn, ime normal now :(

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1

u/Squarebook97379 Jul 27 '24

I ain't taking those, my mommy told me to say no to drugs

1

u/sharkMonstar Fighting for INsanity! Jul 27 '24

abort abort dont wipe

1

u/Societyman19 I am a new character. What should I call myself? Jul 27 '24

https://preview.redd.it/4aw3tcrsz0fd1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c45e6d0f650c7544f5723a0145e5c187d709f0ed

No thanks I’m insane today. Now off to Jonkle.

1

u/Schizo-Garfield69 Jonkler's jonking jerking Jadonka Jonkling Jul 27 '24

Batman.. I NEED MY JONKLE PILLS!! I MUST JONKLE!!

1

u/Kanji_alt just created this new flair, what should i name it? Jul 27 '24

N-NO I HAVE TO JONK! WHERE’S THE ALSUME MEDICATION

1

u/Infamous-Rhubarb-474 Jul 27 '24

DOUBLE HEADER!!!

1

u/The_Electric_54 Jul 27 '24

You're going to need a stronger dose than that.

1

u/Radiant_Chemist_1757 Daddy's Dollotron Jul 27 '24

You can take the me out of the aslume but you can’t take the aslume out of me

1

u/Shrekowski Jul 27 '24

What are those things on top of man’s head

1

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '24

1

u/PleaseAdminsUnbanMe Jul 27 '24

Mhh no effect i'm immune

1

u/Jerome_Valeska1419 Jul 27 '24

I don’t need medication. The aslume never takes hold of me. 🤷‍♂️ Thanks, though, I guess.

1

u/sarcastichummus Jul 27 '24

I fucking love this subreddit lmao

1

u/_xXskeletorXx_ man isnt the hero we need, deserve or want, we’re stuck with him Jul 27 '24

I can see clearly now… wait, what’s this? “Pro Aslume Pills?” Sounds like a good time!

1

u/AHMED_3OOOO who the FUCK am i? Jul 27 '24

Why's Man horny and trying to give me poison? Why's Man with a bat? Playing baseman?

1

u/Style_person Desiring Peace Jul 27 '24 
I trust, those pills are yummy

1

u/RareAd3009 Jul 27 '24

No. No. No. I’ll never go back. Never.

1

u/JediGRONDmaster officer balls Jul 27 '24

I wiped :(

1

u/UpsetLawfulness2065 who the FUCK am i? Jul 27 '24

NOOO!!! I WILL NOT TAKE THOSE PILLS!!!

https://preview.redd.it/gxioj17nc2fd1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b529f645290bb5c7990e9e935b11377200d9b579

JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE! JONKLE!

1

u/Pulsarlewd Jul 27 '24

am i smart

1

u/Critical_Buy_7335 Insanity Hunter Jul 27 '24

Good job agent we will meet again

1

u/Heisuke780 Jul 27 '24

I DIDN'T SWIPE!!!

1

u/Stannisarcanine Jul 27 '24

I swipped up

1

u/Memer_Man_9000 Jul 27 '24

IT’S BATMAN!!!!!!

1

u/Primary_Spinach7333 Jul 27 '24 edited Jul 27 '24

Oh my god it actually worked, oh no…

1

u/sch1zo_mech_f4n Alsume Inmate Jul 27 '24

AAAAAAAAA SAVE YOURSELVES LEAVE ME

*ugh dying.mp3*

1

u/TehChaseyKid Asylum Guard Jul 27 '24

Thank you. GET ME OUTTA HERE.

1

u/ARCS17 Jul 27 '24

Noooo I refuse ittt

1

u/InitialAnimal9781 Perseverer Of Madness Jul 27 '24

Jokes on you. I take super permanent pro alsume pills. You can’t change me

1

u/XtremeCrew69 Desiring Peace Jul 27 '24

I HAVE THE SANE INSANITY! YOU CAN'T STOP ME

1

u/PhysicalWave40 Jul 27 '24

Hello everybody my name is Welcome

1

u/Mrbuttboi Fighting for Sanity! Jul 27 '24

Take it

1

u/The_names_Jay Jul 27 '24

DONT SWAIPE ⚠BRUH⚠...⚠BRUH⚠...⚠BRUH⚠... . Ḇ̶̧̜̤̱̦͈͉̎̍͋͋͋r̶̥̹͚͕͚̠̖̣͚̀͋͆͒̾̂̊̊͐̀͘u̵̟̪͍̤̯̻̞̝͓͍̱͔͂̃̅̄̿̾̌͐̎̽̀̽̂̕ǔ̷̗̯͎̲̭̫͙͛͆̐͛͑̿̈́̂̚̚ͅu̴̼̼͍̻̲͇̬̾̐͌̀͌͒̀͒͆̈́͊̇ṵ̴̬̮̤̼̪̳̺͕̜̲̦̖̋̿̄̈̿͐̈́͠ư̶͕͈̻͚͖͙͕̫̜̑̃̇̋̽͘͜͝ų̸̺̘̈́̐͛ͅų̸̻͈̜͓̫͎̫͙̖̟̦̌̃̈͊̊̒̅ͅṵ̴͉͚͔͕͕̙̭͚̠̮̄̂̈͂̂́͌͘u̴̡̥̥̮͔͕̤̙͔̹͐͗͊̀̒ṵ̶̭̱͖͓̠͙͗̀̍̈́̍͜ų̷̠̮͓͈͔͍̯͔̖̳̘̿́͌̌̕ư̴͒̈̑͐̌̋͒͛̕͠

1

u/Top-While-2560 STOP POSTING ABOUT J O N K L E Jul 27 '24

Hey keep those aw-§ğ&ìęůģķľá:;č he was batman all along...

1

u/Lemmy-user Jul 27 '24

I don't trust you. I trusted the other guy before. And i did swip millions of time. It felt so good. When i stopped because of my phone losing its battery. I felt so bad i attempted to kill myself. Unfortunately it didn't work but 3 people's died in the accident.

1

u/No_Emu5267 Jul 27 '24

NOOO WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME

1

u/friendlywhale99 Aslume inmate Jul 27 '24

Im atupid, why dided i wipe…

1

u/Darkness_Voi6 Jul 27 '24

MODS ERASE THIS TRAITORS' FACE

1

u/Thewaltham Jul 27 '24

I'm not stupid anymore.

This sucks man.

1

u/MyNameIsYoshikage- Jul 27 '24

We should've know! Man had the wrong emblem on his chest!

1

u/Kimor98 Jul 27 '24

You dropped this ;)