r/TheBoys • u/kittehgoesmeow Payback • 17d ago

Valorie Curry kindly asks fans to not cross boundaries when meeting her and to stop demanding her to do certain acts Season 4

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u/Taraxian 17d ago

Yeah I appreciate no one else in the room was laughing but someone should've stepped up and directly told the guy to fuck off instead of letting her repeatedly try to get rid of him and fail

79

u/mankytoes 17d ago

It isn't always that straightforward. I've been "that guy" before and been told I just made things worse.

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u/chumstrike 17d ago

Then the bystander effect is in play, and they're applying hindsight bias. You don't know what's going to happen, but you know what the right thing to do is. You decided not to be a spectator to your own life, and I salute that.

4

u/OrphanMasher 16d ago

Because escalation from random people has such a great history. Get security or management if you want, but chances are the only thing you'll accomplish by getting in someone's face in a situation like this is make a bigger scene, draw even more attention to the already uncomfortable victim, and stroke your own ego.

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u/BandAid3030 16d ago

Right, but that's on them then as well. You can't predict the future, but you can definitely tell when something is wrong in the present.

You walk past the standard that you accept, and so if you don't speak up in these situations, especially if you are a man, you are telling others that this behaviour is okay.

That doesn't mean you need to step in with aggression or to blow everything up. You can step in and support her by echoing what she's saying or identifying what she's experiencing, validating it and amplifying the responsibility for what she's experiencing being on this person. You can openly say that this is unacceptable behaviour. You can call for security. You can do many other things that are not directly confrontational or expanding of the emotional baseline of the situation.

I'm glad that you have stood up in the past, and I hope that you won't let the feedback you've received reduce the likelihood of your standing up in the future.

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u/DemandezLesOiseaux 16d ago

That is pretty rare and usually only happens when you’re stepping in between a relationship. And the person probably felt embarrassed, honestly. But in a case like this get event security when you see something wrong. 

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u/Connect-One-3867 17d ago

Yeah, escalation always works out.

I do think security should have removed them, though.

-6

u/MickeyRooneysPills 17d ago

Appeasement didn't work in world War II and it never works ever. Letting shitheads do whatever they want because we're afraid of confrontation or escalation or the way they're going to react is literally just terrorism and it's part of the reason everything is so fucked up right now. People prefer the comfort of the chaos they're familiar with more than risking experiencing the chaos of change. Because sure we're being steered towards destruction by ignorant psychopaths but if we say anything to them they might get mad :(

Fuck off with that namby pamby bullshit.

12

u/TantricEmu 17d ago

Bro with that profile pic calling people namby pamby is wild.

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u/Jermz12345 16d ago

I thought it was that one picture of a broom made to look like an ass but nope it really is an ass

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u/phil_davis 17d ago

Bro went straight to WWII geopolitics, holy shit lol. This is the most reddit-brained comment I've seen in my life.

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u/Square_Resolve_925 16d ago

Lmfao get a fucking grip. Bringing up literal WAR to make a point that's dense as fuck